Why Personal Connections Matter to Your Job Search

For the past week, I’ve been obsessively watching the second season of the Umbrella Academy on Netflix. I’m not done yet, but I suspect that the second season might be even better than the first.

One of the most impressive things about the show is the story arc. It seems like every major character (and some minor ones too) is going through a personal hero’s journey. All the while, the Umbrella Academy, as a collective, is going through that same journey too.

The hero’s journey refers to a classic story structure that can be grouped into 3 basic stages:

• Departure: The hero lives in the ordinary world when she receives a call to adventure. At first, she refuses the call, but then is convinced by circumstance or a mentor to answer it;
• Initiation: After answering the call, the hero enters a “special world” or unknown territory. At this stage, the hero goes through a series of trials and tribulations until the ultimate battle where she uses everything she has learned along the way to win the war; and 
• Return: After the final battle, the hero triumphantly returns to the ordinary world and realizes she is forever changed for the better because of her adventure. 

Seeing the hero’s journey play out on my television this week, I couldn’t help but compare it to my clients’ journeys as they change careers. 

These professionals leave the ordinary world of the job they know in search of something more fulfilling. They experience trials and tribulations along the way, but in the end, they are forever changed because they took the journey toward a career they love.

One of the most essential parts of their journeys are the allies they meet along the way. In career speak, those allies are called a network.

Experts estimate that nearly 70% of all job seekers get their jobs through networking. So, it seems that, like the siblings in the Umbrella Academy, career changers have a very slim chance of achieving their career goals unless they work with their personal connections. Here’s why.  

We Are Wired For Networking

Stanford research has said that: “[h]uman beings have been socially networked in one manner or another for as long as we have been on the planet. And we have historically availed ourselves to the many successive techniques and instruments for facilitating and maintaining such networks. These include structured social affiliations and institutions such as private and public clubs, lodges, churches … the post office, courier systems, telegraphs and telephones, and..the Internet.”

We are wired for networking just as we are hardwired to learn through stories. Historically, our networks have served a vital role in our survival, happiness, and sense of community and belonging. So it only makes sense that our networks would be necessary for our career goals too.

A Network Is Just A Series Of Personal Connections

Often networking can feel like a daunting task. It can seem like most of it involves standing around small tables in hotel ballrooms, making awkward small talk with people you don’t know.  

But that’s not what networking is. 

Networking is about connecting with people. To expand your network, you increase the number of people that you know and that know you. You don’t have to attend a bland network event to do that, though. Getting to know someone can happen anywhere, from the grocery store to Instagram. And most importantly, that network is a gateway to building community and friendship.

Confidence and Networking Are Interconnected

Most often, people dislike networking because it makes them feel anxious. People don’t want to talk about themselves because they are convinced that no one wants to hear what they have to say or that they are not charming, extroverted, or gregarious enough to make connections.

When you feel anxious or worried about how you will be perceived by others, people feel that energy. It becomes hard for them to connect with you because you’re not giving them a chance to really experience who you are. But when you feel more confident, you tend to be more open to meeting people, having conversations, and talking to people who are a little bit outside of your comfort zone. You know that your self-worth isn’t tied to their perception of you. It’s tied to what really matters – what you think of you.

So you don’t have to be a different type of person to network effectively. You just have to be confident in who you are. 

Do you know other reasons why personal connections are essential for the job search? Let me know in the comments below.